Struggling to help your bright and quirky child with executive function challenges? Seth Perler, an expert in executive functioning, offers invaluable insights into how to support your child’s growth without overwhelming them. Learn simple strategies that focus on building a foundation for success, respecting your child’s unique timeline, and creating a nurturing environment for growth.
Building the Foundation for Executive Function Success
When working with bright and quirky children, parents often feel frustrated when progress doesn’t happen on their timeline. Seth Perler emphasizes that breakthroughs are rare, and the key to success lies in small, consistent steps. These children need patience and support, as they don’t develop at the same pace as others. Instead of focusing on immediate results, it’s essential to focus on building a strong foundation with patience and empathy.
“What’s really important are things like sleep, nutrition, and the relationshipyou build with your child.”
Focus on the Process, Not Just the Product
One common mistake parents make is pressuringtheir children to perform on a specific timeline or to complete tasks at a certain speed. This only breeds frustration and resistance. Instead, Perler suggests shifting the focus from task completionto learning. For example, one of Perler’s students made significant progress, not by getting perfect grades, but by asking for help independently—a huge milestone for a child who once avoided seeking help.
Patience is Key for Asynchronous Development
Children with executive function challenges often develop asynchronously, meaning their growth is out of sync with their peers. They may show remarkable strengths in some areas while struggling with basic tasks in others. This developmental delay means that patience is crucial—it may take 10 times longerthan expected for your child to develop specific skills.
Perler encourages parents to celebrate each small successrather than focus on deficits. Whether it’s cleaning a bedroom or asking for help, recognizing these moments fosters confidence and resilience.
Shifting Your Mindset for More Effective Support
Parents should avoid focusing on what their child hasn’t accomplished. Instead, they should celebrate what has been done, no matter how small.
“Focus on what they’re doing right—celebrate those moments. When you see them doing something well, compliment them sincerely and express how it makes you feel.”
Key Takeaways
- Patience and empathyare essential when supporting executive function development.
- Small, incremental progressis more important than immediate results.
- Celebrate every success, no matter how small, to build confidence and motivation.
- Avoid focusing on what your child isn’t doing and instead highlight what they are doing right.
- Shifting your communication style can lead to long-term success for your child.
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